Blissfully Ignorant

Can I just get real for a minute? Some days, I don't want to try, to be good or better or nice or pretty. Choosing grace and love just feels like work and frankly, sometimes like it's not even worth it. It doesn't make a difference, no one will notice or care and I'll just be resentful. Some days I'm frustrated that people don't know Jesus or don't love Him or worse they do but their actions don't show it. I get mad at God for holding me to a level of accountability that others don't seem to even know exists. I feel alone and discouraged; no amount of prayers or scripture can pull me away from the greatest pity party I'm throwing myself. Some days, in matters of faith, I think ignorance might be bliss. No accountability. No failure. No knowing any better.

Today at work, one of my dear friends wore a shirt that, in her defense, was black but in the right lighting you could see the image on her bra. We happened to have a meeting with our manager that day along with some other random office conversations. She walked a few blocks away to pick up lunch so she probably saw no less than twenty people today. All the while, having no clue that you could see through her shirt. She was blissfully ignorant!  So until she went to the bathroom and saw in that light a reflection of herself that you could in fact notice the cute little butterflies obviously trying to peek out. She was of course mortified as each person's face she talked to that day began popping up in her mind, wondering if any or all of them noticed. All of a sudden, she didn't feel blissful. She felt embarrassed and frustrated. Our other coworker and great friend, had on a black tank top under her sweater than she quickly shimmied off and handed over to her. All of this is happening in the doorway of my office so we're laughing hysterically. We made several jokes about her bra and how quickly our friend got that tank top off without anyone hardly noticing what she did. It was a great moment.

While her ignorance was bliss for a while, when she was completely made aware of the situation, she wished she had known all along because then she could have made a better choice from the beginning. And if she hadn't found out half way through the day, we wouldn't have had the best laugh which I desperately needed on this tough "some day".

Sarah Young who writes Jesus Calling, wrote today, "The fog is a protection for you, calling you back into the present moment. Some day the fog will no longer be necessary, for you will have learned to keep your focus on me and on the path just ahead of you."

1 Corinthians 13:11-12 says, "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known."

Days when I can be blissfully ignorant, I will try to be thankful for it could be a blessing, sparing me from things I don't know could hurt me. And when some days come and I know God is calling me higher, I'll try to be humbly obedient believing with my whole heart that I am His, knowing He loves me with an everlasting love and I never want to live, even blissfully, ignorant to that great love.